When feelings run hot, these are the words for cooling them down. Some comfort a person who is hurting; some win over a person who is angry, often by giving something; some shrink a bad feeling; one stops trouble outright; and two settle a quarrel.
Key idea
Comfort: soothe, console. Win over someone angry: appease, mollify, conciliate. Ease a feeling: assuage (pain, hunger, guilt), allay (fear, worry, doubt). Stop it: quell. Settle a conflict: reconcile, defuse.
The ten words
Common mistake
defuse (calm a situation, as if removing a bomb's fuse) is not diffuse (spread out). You allay fears; you don't "alley" or "ally" them.
| word | what it calms | you might hear |
|---|---|---|
| soothe | pain, worry, a crying child | soothe a baby |
| console | sadness, disappointment | console a friend |
| appease | a person’s demands | appease the critics |
| mollify | a person’s anger | mollify an upset customer |
| conciliate | an angry person | conciliate the workers |
| assuage | hunger, thirst, pain, guilt | assuage his guilt |
| allay | fear, worry, doubt | allay her fears |
| quell | a riot, a rumor, a fear | quell the rumors |
| reconcile | a quarrel; two facts that disagree | reconcile two friends |
| defuse | a tense situation | defuse the argument |
Three look-alikes to keep apart. You defuse a tense situation (as if pulling the fuse from a bomb), but light, smells and ideas diffuse, or spread out. You allay fears; an alley is a lane and an ally is a friend on your side. And appease sometimes carries a warning: giving in to demands can buy calm now and invite bigger demands later.