Birthday parties start with invitations, and invitations come with jobs for both the host and the guests. Like having a friend over, the goal is that everyone feels welcome, including people who aren’t coming.
Key idea
When you get an invitation, reply by the date it asks: “RSVP” means please reply. When you are the host, don’t hand out invitations or talk about the party in front of people who were not invited.
Why it works
A host needs to know how many people are coming to plan food, seats and games. Replying, yes or no, is a kindness to them. “RSVP” comes from the French répondez s’il vous plaît, “please reply.” And because not everyone can be invited to every party, keeping invitations private spares feelings.
Worked example: Replying
Leo gets the invitation above. He can come. What should he do, and by when?
- Find the reply line: RSVP to Omar’s mom by May 2.
- Have a parent help him call or text her before May 2.
- Say yes clearly and thank her: “Leo would love to come. Thank you for inviting him!”
Answer: Reply to Omar’s mom by May 2: “Leo would love to come. Thank you!”
Worked example: Can’t come
Mia is invited to Hana’s party but has a family trip that day. Does she need to reply?
- Yes. “RSVP” asks for a reply either way.
- Reply by the date: “Thank you so much for inviting me. I’m sorry I can’t come; we’ll be away. I hope it’s a great party!”
- She can wish Hana a happy birthday at school.
Answer: Yes. Reply by the date with thanks and regrets.
Common mistake
Never replying, or saying yes and then not showing up. The host is counting on your answer. If your plans change after you reply, tell the host as soon as you can.
Hosting? Invite either the whole class or a small group quietly, by mail, by a parent’s text, or in person away from the others. At the party, talk about it only with the guests.